People tell you that you should write down your birth story so you won't forget such a miraculous moment. I thought, "How could you forget such an amazing moment?" Well, after two weeks, I can already tell that some of the minor details are starting to fade. So, I better write this thing as best as I can! Sorry ahead for the length of it!
To begin, I'll share with you the changes that occurred previous to Levi being born. As many of you know, we had been planning all along on a natural birth. We took Bradley classes and prepared and practiced all throughout the pregnancy for the big day. Every day we got closer and closer to the due date, we got a little more excited and nervous for what was about to happen. We so wanted to meet our little baby! But, as we rounded the 40 week mark, we did an extra ultrasound and non-stress test to make sure baby was still doing fine. All was good and the baby was still very healthy. But when I met with my midwife, she realized that the ultrasound tech failed to give me the weight estimate on the baby. She did what was my second internal in the last week and saw that I was not dilated at all, nor had the baby "dropped", but still high up in my belly. Afterwards, she went and talked with the ultrasound tech and then sat me down. This is where everything I had planned and prepared for the birth of our baby turned wildly upside down. She started to explain that the tech did not have the measurements because our baby maxed out the measurements on the machine. Which meant, he was estimating at 10+ pounds. How often does this happen seriously? Sorry, your baby is too big to be measured by our technology...Because of his size as well as him not dropping, they also had doubts about the size of my inner pelvis and whether or not he would even fit in a vaginal birth. Because of this, my midwife explained that the only option was to do a cesarean. Well, I tried to take a few breaths and then absolutely broke down crying because all I had worked so hard to do in the last ten months came crashing down in a big heap. I did everything right, exercised regularly, ate healthily, attended birthing classes, practiced birthing and relaxation techniques, everything. We had so wanted a natural birth that the idea of not having one was almost impossible to accept. I asked about any other options or even induction, but because he was still so high, it would be dangerous for both of us. If we were to be induced and if labor progressed, he could get stuck and they'd have to push him back in me to do an emergency C-section. If his head made it out, but his shoulders were stuck, they might have to break his collar bone and cause very unnecessary damage. Not to mention the damage that could be done on me...Obviously, we wanted what was best for the baby and I, but that doesn't mean we weren't grieved by what was happening. Most of all, I felt as though they were telling me I was unable to perform one of the main purposes and privileges my body has as a woman: to give birth. All my life, I have heard, "You have good birthing hips, you'll do great!" But, this was not true. Maybe my hips are fine, I don't know and we can't know until the next pregnancy and see if things are any different.
That night, Jon and I prayed a lot and called others to pray about the situation. We also talked to our Bradley instructor and she gave us some ideas for a last shot with natural induction and she also was praying for us, which was so dear. I think we tried about 9 different natural induction techniques and the next morning I woke up with what seemed like a small tear and my bag of waters had leaked. So, we went back to the midwife and she checked me again and there was no progress and it seemed like the tear had repaired itself. We had two more days until our scheduled cesarean and after a lot of crying, prayer, and talking with each other, we decided that it really was the best thing for us to have the cesarean and not to even put it off just to wait and see what would happen. If we had waited longer, he would have gotten bigger and getting him out may have been even more of a problem. Plus, the risks of possibly going into labor and him getting stuck and having to push him back in me or him hurting me inside was not worth the risk. Those three days before his birth seemed like the longest days ever. I had finally stopped working that Monday after my appointment, I was done, just done. I knew I needed these few days before he was born and emotionally I was fried. These days with Jonathon were also good for me and it was a special time of bonding during a difficult and yet soon to be happy time.
Skip ahead a few days of emotional ups and downs and we come to Thursday, May 2nd at 5:30am when I woke up to get ready to go to the hospital. We arrived at the hospital at 6:30am to be prepped and ready for the surgery. Surprisingly, I was quite calm about the whole thing, especially since I hate hospitals so much and I had been so worried the few days before. Jon on the other hand, was quite concerned. But while in the hospital waiting, we prayed and read the Bible together. During this time at the hospital, I was having some decently intense regular contractions. I had been having contractions for awhile without anything progressing, but it seemed like our baby was still trying to be born. Also that morning, it seemed I had lost my mucus plug (sorry, I still hate that phrase). So, between that and my contractions, my body was trying to work that baby out, but was getting nowhere. My midwife asked if I wanted to be checked for dilation, but I didn't even care at that point. Oh, huge blessing to have my midwife there! Normally, I don't think they come to cesareans, but she was so disappointed in how things had changed that she wanted to support me. And not only be there, but she said she and the nurses talked to "the powers that be" and made sure that the baby wouldn't be swept away from me right away and that I would be able to see the baby and nurse them as soon as they were done with me. It was such a relief knowing that they had tried their best to give me some things that I had wanted.
Around 8:30, they took me into the operating room and separated me from Jon. This is where I started to freak out. I didn't have Jon to keep me calm, I didn't know what was going on, it was cold, and they were giving me an epidural. My midwife quickly jumped in and grabbed my hand and I tried to remain calm. I feel like my prayers were only one or two words during this time, I had nothing else but a few words. After I was all prepped, they brought Jon in and started away. They also ended up making the incision a little bigger because of the size of the baby. Jon said he could see I was very scared but was trying to be brave. I remember one point where they were pushing on my abdomen to get him out and I couldn't really breathe and Jon sang in my ear. He knew what I needed and it helped. When the OB looked inside of me, he noticed that the baby was also transverse, the head not straight on my pelvis but instead turned. So, on top of every other issue, being slightly turned was also causing issues in the baby dropping into my pelvis. No wonder I had such pain as the pregnancy progressed! Soon after, they told Jon to stand up and take a picture because the baby was coming out of me. Shockingly, he stood up and took a few pictures! Then, at 9:10am, Jon got to announce that it was a boy! Neither of us were surprised that it was a boy, we both felt like it was the whole time. Then, Jon followed him to the warmer and helped shorten the cord and get him cleaned up. Dr. Levy asked, "What are you going to name your little linebacker?" and we said, Levi Jonathon. He responded, "Oh, I love when patients name their children after me!" Obviously, his is said a little differently, but it was funny still. Everyone in the OR was saying how big and gorgeous he was, that's all I kept hearing. They finally weighed him and he was 9lbs. 15oz, just an ounce short of 10 pounds! Dr. Levy's response was, "One more biscuit this morning and he would've been ten pounds." He also said that even though my belly was huge, I was all baby and he was so shocked that I held the big guy in there! After putting everything back in its place, he said I could have a regular birth, so long as my babies aren't ten pounds in the future. Well, I don't know that that is too promising, so we'll have to wait and see until the next one comes along. By 9:50, I was in the recovery room nursing Levi Jonathon. Jon had been waiting there with him while they stitched and stapled me up and he said Levi was rooting around and very hungry. An answer to prayer, Levi had no problem latching and eating was no problem for this big boy.
Well, that's it, from start to finish. If you made it through that long story, great job! There's a lot that's been going on since that time two weeks ago, but we have been loving having Levi in our lives and learning to be his parents. So, although I didn't feel like I had given birth the way I wanted to, I did give birth to a wonderful baby boy. We are all so thankful that he is healthy and out safe with us and that's all that really matters!
